It’s funny to think about life and fact from perspectives..
On this picture I was 57kg and still thought that I was looking fat and would starve and workout like crazy so I could go to the 54kg.
Life is all about timings, phases and ups and lows.
We have to understand that we can’t look the best we can all the time, and stop pushing ourselves so hard to a model that it’s not our body type, and will never be.
Of course, I’m a model since I was 14 and I like to be slim, it’s my bio type and no matter how much weight I put on I still look long and thin. But for so long I thought I had to fit in the “standard” measurements like 34inches hips, which I never had, even when I was 10 years old i guess, and for asking so much from myself all the time I’d easily get frustrated and give up.
I went through a very bad phase, and still going, and I’m not ashamed or embarrassed on admit it. So I’ve put on weight, let myself fade away, forget about the gym! and some days I’d just look in the mirror and cry, cause I was getting further and further from that role “self” I so much fought for and it made me more unhappy and frustrated so I’d just let myself go even more, eat even more, do more stupid things, cause I’m already on my lowest, how worse can it get? But trust me, it can always get worse.
I went through that phase, and it’s ok, we all go through phases, but something we can never let got its OURSELVES.
We can never forget how much important we are, each one of us, and that we did and make the difference everyday, we’re special in our own way and we can never let anyone say the opposite!
Now I’m weighting 64kg, and I’m 1,79 cm, and if it was like a year ago I’d be so embarrassed on saying it out loud “64kg”! But you know what? I don’t care anymore, not that I’ve let myself “gone”, it’s just because I’ve accepted that I’m nothing else but HUMAN. I’m entitled to suffer, being sad, being happy, eat, diet, workout or just don’t, I’m entitle to everything and anything I want because only I know what is like living my own life!
I’m entitle to have my ups and downs like anyone else and being bad sometimes cause no one it’s perfect. I’m entitle to be HAPPY! #imentitled!
